Waiting for a Husband?

By Candace Davidson

Have you ever thought of waiting as a gift from the Lord? I have not always known that, but I'm glad He has opened my eyes! It does not have to be a "trial" or a "struggle." If we are willing, it can be one of the sweetest times of our lives with our Savior.

I am waiting on God for a somewhat unusual gift - a husband! Not just any husband. I could have probably obtained that years ago by giving in to all the "match making" my friends and family have tried to do, or better yet, picked someone out for myself. But, I don't trust my own judgment in these vital areas if life. I figure it would be terribly easy for me to make a bad choice on something so important and lasting.

One day, when I was around 18 years old, and had just left the halls of a public high school for good, I decided that I needed to give God control over every area of my life. I asked Him to choose a mate for me - the one He had actually designed from before the foundation of the world, the one that I could never be capable of finding by myself, apart from God's sovereign wisdom.

Marriage is such a holy thing, something that perfectly demonstrates Christ's love for us, His bride. When it comes time for me to walk down the aisle, I want to make sure the man I'm gazing lovingly at is the one God chose for me! For this reason, I have made the choice to not date - a radical decision, many tell me, but one that God has lead me to nevertheless. As Eric and Leslie Ludy put it so beautifully "I have given God the 'pen' and the freedom to write my love story, taking my error-full hands off."

However, I have learned that with the beautiful idea comes learning how to be patient. This is the most difficult part. It's hard to believe in what we cannot see. Through the years, the Lord has taught me several things about waiting and contentment and my once hasty heart has finally learned to "sleep" in God's will until He wakes my "Adam" up. If He, in His sovereignty chooses to never give me a husband, then in true God-given contentment I can say, "That's okay, because Jesus is more than enough, and my life is full and overflowing because of Him. I need nothing more to complete me."

God's holy, faultless word tells us in Isaiah 49:23, "They shall not be ashamed who wait for me." I believe this means that though our patience on the Lord's timing may seem foolish to those around us, and even to ourselves at times, God has assured us that we will not be put to shame by waiting on Him. What a relief! His Word also tells that those who "wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings as eagles." (Isaiah 40:31) I have often tried to imagine how it must feel as an eagle to soar effortlessly among the clouds. The only word I can think of to describe the experience is freedom. When we wait upon the Lord, we find freedom as well as strength!

The Apostle Paul urges us to be content in every circumstance. This cannot be done except by the power of God at work in our lives. In our natural, carnal state, we are simply not capable of having peace and serenity when things in our life seem so uncertain. However, through Christ, we are able to have incomprehendable peace, peace that our human brains are not able to understand.

There are many things God wants to teach us during our "waiting period," no matter what it is we may be waiting on Him for. I know that I have a whole lot of things yet to learn. I can only pray I'll remain open and teachable. He wants our time the "waiting room" to be a joyful experience. He wants us to "enjoy the scenery" and not dwell on the destination only. When we really understand that His way and timing is absolutely perfect, then we are able to solely, with no reserve, trust Him. And when we trust Him, even when we cannot see, we will be able to receive the true contentment that only Christ Jesus can offer us.

God has shown me four basic ways that I can embrace the gift of waiting and make the most of this season in my life.

1. Savor Every Moment

More than likely, once the object of our waiting has been brought to pass, changes will take place and life as we know it will be different. Anytime there is a change, we will lose privileges, even if they are replaced with new ones. Take this time that God has given you and enjoy it! Be well aware that you will not have these exact moments of your life back - ever again. This season will more than likely not last forever, so remember, no matter what you may be waiting on God for, the present days are only yours once. Do not be in such a hurry that you miss out on all the present blessings God is showering you with.

2. Do Not Wait Idly

Keep yourself busy for the Lord and your family. Ask Him to bring opportunities your way to minister, witness and bring glory to His name. Do things that will help prepare you for what you may be waiting on. Honor your father and mother and others in your life by doing special things for them. Practice submission and self-dying by putting others' needs before your own. Offer child care while mommies and daddies go on a much needed "date." I have to say that I have been blessed by doing this! I have learned so much. Every time I walk into a godly home, full of laughter and the pitter-patter of precious little feet, I take mental note on tips that I will use with my own children someday. I leave feeling so rewarded by God. Refuse to look at your time of waiting as a "pity party," but serve others and receive the joy that comes with obedience! Stay busy for the glory of the Lord. Nothing you do for Him will ever be in vain!


3. Be a Broken Vessel

Humble yourself in the sight of the Lord and He will lift you up. Share your heart's deepest desires with Him. Cry unto Him, uncensored. Pour yourself out in prayer and worship. Become a piece of soft, pliable clay in your Maker's hands. Ask Him to reveal Himself to you in a way that you have not yet known. Be willing to allow your wishes to die, taking Christ as your All in All. Ask Him to reassure you that He is more than enough for you. He will. When we say, "Not my will, but Thine be done.", that is usually when He truly moves in our lives. He desires to have our utterly surrendered heart.

4. Work Double Time for the Lord

I feel that singleness is a wonderful time to give all our strength to the Lord through missions. Remember that missions do not have to be across the world's oceans. They can be across the street or even inside your home! This is such an ideal time to become a hard-working laborer in His plentiful vineyard of ripe souls.

Maybe you are waiting on a healing to take place in your body, an adoption to go through, a loved one to come to Jesus, or God to fill your womb with life - or maybe, like me, you are waiting for a husband, having placed it into the hands of the Master Match-Maker. I challenge you to walk by me in faith and watch God move in His perfect, beautiful time. This way, He gets all the glory. He is orchestrating it all. All we have to do is listen, trust, and obey.

Candace Davidson, 27, still lives at home with her parents in the Appalachian Mountains of VA as she waits for God to reveal His choice for a husband in His time and way.

Email: candle4him(at)comcast(dot)net

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